It’s November! Did you know? I’m sure you did. You’re all
such awfully smart people. I’m just sitting here listening to Sam Tsui’s “Love
the Way You Lie” mashup and wondering why I let myself eat so much food for
lunch, writing a blog post. I lead a simple life, but that doesn’t mean it’s a
bad one :)
Today is day seven of thirty of this month known as November, and so far so good. The first week of NaNoWriMo is past. Guess who's still up to date with her word count. Not to brag or anything. If you're a bit behind, no worries. There's still time to catch up. It's better to do it now than to try to catch up at the end...trust me.
Oh, my song is done. Time to pick a new one. Browsing. Browsing. Aha! We have a winner! (Just kidding. I wrote that before I even looked. Sheesh! Give me a minute, will you?) Alrighty, back to business.
Can you tell I'm stalling because I had a topic, but I've simply forgotten what it was? I think it had something to do with success. We'll go with that.
There was once a time in my life where I considered myself quite accomplished. Not a lot accomplished, but enough to be satisfied. I had some opportunities that not everybody has. Even looking back, I'm grateful for those opportunities, as simple as some may seem. It was some point after I graduated with my Bachelor's that I began to wonder if I had done anything of merit at all. Sure I had a couple diplomas under my belt, but I thought things were meant to be easier after that. I'd get my diploma and the rest of my life would be handed to me on a silver platter. In case you were wondering or haven't figured it out for yourself yet, life doesn't always go according to plan.
That's not always a bad thing. I think sometimes we like things better because they didn't go exactly how we imagined they'd be. Or maybe we just appreciate things better when it doesn't come on a platter, but instead comes after much work. And then there are times where we look at our lives and say, "This is hard." It's the times when things aren't going to plan and it's hard that we tend to put ourselves down or think that we've done nothing of value. It's an easy thing to fall into, something that all of us face at one point or another. Fear not! You'll get through it. Unfortunately, it may take you longer than you would like.
During the time since I graduated from BYU-I until now (approximately a year and half), there have been a couple times where I thought that I wasn't successful and was therefore worthless. Dang, that's harsh, but aren't we a little harsh when we're feeling down? You see, my idea of success and worth meant that I would be able to support myself without help from others (i.e. move out of my parents' house and be crazy rich! Okay, not crazy rich, but definitely making more money than I am now.).
I recently got a certificate in publishing from the University of Denver. It was a great experience. The whole time I thought, "This is it. After this I'm finally going to be able to get a job that actually uses my degree, and I'll be able to live off it!" I expected that to take two weeks tops before I got my first job that would lead to a series of ultimate success. Let me tell you, I've finally acquired a part time seasonal job, and I've never been so happy to be employed in my life! Is it the job I want forever? No. Can I live on my own with that income? No. Is the job even permanent? Unless they decide they want to squeeze me in as a regular once the season is done, no. So I'm not successful right? Not necessarily.
In the past couple of days, I've been thinking about success again. It's a lot nicer thinking about it when you're in a good mood. I think of all the things I haven't accomplished that I generally view as being a measure of true success, or at least what I would like my success to look like. Those are still possibilities in my future, and just because they haven't happened or may never happen doesn't mean I'm a failure or worthless. What I need to do is change the way I look at things. Take joy in the little accomplishments. Try to turn failures into a chance to learn and better myself. I'm up to date with NaNoWriMo! I am therefore successful :)
I realized yesterday that if I'm doing all I can to try and better myself, and to serve others, and strengthen my trust and faith in God and do my best to follow His will, am I not therefore successful? If I ended up having to move back in with my parents for a time as I strive to find a place in the world where I can fit and provide for myself, would that make me a failure? No, I don't believe it would. Obviously living with my parents for all my life isn't the number one choice, but I know if I fall so down on my luck that I need a helping hand to lift me up that my parents will always be there, and for that I am eternally grateful.
There are certainly things I need to work on. I recently discovered that I have very little patience. The good thing about discovering our shortcomings is that we can then work to improve them. And it is with small successes that we can reach greater successes. Take a look in your life and be grateful for the many blessings you have. You can find success in your life.
And that, my friends, is my lengthy blog post of wisdom for the day. And just so you know, I really am grateful for my education and for all the experiences I had while earning those degrees. I wouldn't take those times back for the world. I just forgot that in a moment of weakness. I wish you luck in your current and future goals!
